But your eyes have become old, even though I never thought they could, and your voice is gruff and haggard although the soft undertone remains. I walk with you but this time I'm ahead, this time I look back to see a shaggy pavement drizzled with stones, your lofting body crinkled and old, liver spots darkened cheeks hollowed out, skin like the skin on custard. Your fingertips are calloused and I wonder how you still feel, your eyelashes are receding and I wonder what it's like when you cry, your lips are thinning and your healthy fat has burned away. Skeletal you are before me, the shadow of the shadow that you once were. Puddles of tears well in my eyes when you struggle with my name, torrents of tears fall when you can't recall my face. But a dry silence takes over me when I finally say good bye, because all the salty tears I cried for you - just hurt your too bad too.